Why I am afraid of taking drugs

I am terrified of becoming an addict.

My father is an alcoholic, many people in my mother's family have been addicts.
When my sister smokes hash or takes amphetamines "to study" better, she thinks I'm judging her because I am conventional and straight-laced, which I am. But not about drugs.

I can't imagine losing control of myself. I remember taking sleeping pills and doing things and not remembering anything, and I vowed to myself never to do that again. I get tipsy very fast, so I rarely drink more than two glasses of wine at a time, say once a month.

Not everyone becomes an addict. I know people who do drugs recreationally.

I'm just scared that I won't be able to, so I don't touch anything.

And deep inside, I wish my sister wouldn't either. Because if by chance she does become an addict-I don't think I can witness any more self-destruction again.